A resolution I can stick too...

I am not a big fan of resolutions. Yep…I have been one that has made those crazy resolutions in my past…go to they gym every day, work hard to get good grades…sure they all sound good new years eve when you are drinking wine and have no worries in the world. Two weeks later I can barely even remember why I thought I would accomplish those things.

2018 led me down a different path. I wanted to make a resolution that I could absolutely stick with. My resolution in 2018 was to do me and not let other people muddle in my relationships with others as well as my life.

It has taken 30 solid years to get to this place in life and looking back I can see why I had the friends that I did. I have always been closer with men than women and I think it’s because there is not a lot of drama to men. They can be mad at each other, punch each other, and move on all in about 20 minutes. Women tend to work a bit differently.

In high school I had 4 girls that I was close to but only one that I shared my deepest secrets with. I still call her when I am having any issues in life because I know she will be honest and trustworthy with me. I have had very close friends in the past who were women and they ended like all the relationships do…over something that probably had nothing to do with anything but we got into a little spat and BAM, no more friendship.

My resolution for the year came from a point where I spent all my time trying to balance my time to make things fair with everyone I knew and not hurt anyone’s feelings. As I have stated in previous blog posts, such is life and feelings will get hurt once in a while. My feelings get hurt once in a while and I normally tell Kyle about it, he listens to me complain for a bit, gives me a hug and tells me it’s all going to be alright and that the friends probably didn’t mean to hurt my feelings. After the dust settles, I can see, that in fact, that was the case. They either felt like I wouldn’t enjoy it or already had plans with others.

I don’t ever want to hurt anyone’s feeling but at the same time I can’t help everyone else without getting my own self ran over. Now…on this same note…my house is always open for absolutely anyone and everyone who may or may not need a helping hand. I will be a shoulder to cry on and I will listen to you all that you want. I will not get in the middle of two people fighting or choose sides when there is a disagreement. I will not call out another friend because someone doesn’t feel they are being fair. Will I sit there and listen and allow you to get all your frustrations out; ABSOLUTELY! But I will not step into the middle of a fight unless I feel so compelled to do so and I truly hope that you wouldn’t do that either!

My family enjoys doing a variety of things from hiking, fishing, camping, to lazy afternoons watching beauty and the beast for the 100^th time. We enjoy doing things with different groups of people and we have a wide variety of a circle of friends who all hold unique aspects to us. I wish that it worked to hang out with all friends at all times but that is life and doesn’t work that way.

So for 2018…I am going to focus on my family and I am going to allow them to experience as many fun things as we can. Sometimes it may include others and sometimes it may not. It doesn’t mean that I don’t want to be a part of all of your lives or want you to be a part of ours…it just is what it is.

I hope that you all have found resolutions that you can stick to and accomplish. All I ask from all of you is to not put our friendship in the danger zone but asking me to choose sides or to choose friends. As the old saying goes, there is enough love to go around and that there truly is. I will love and support all of you as you all hold a special piece of my heart. I hope me and my family hold a special place in the hearts of all of you as well. Don’t forget…you will always have a friend in me but I will not choose one out of hundreds of you to specifically spend all my time with! Life is too short and graduated from high school a long time ago; now is time to find those deeply connected friendships where everyone understands life and knows that even if I don’t hang out every single time, I still enjoy our time together and want to find a time to hang out.